Here are a few paragraphs from the first chapter of my book...the new working totle is "yes, they are fake...the real ones tried to kill me!



Chapter One
“I must, I must, I must.”

“I must, I must, I must increase my bust!” This was the mantra of my tween years- before I knew what a mantra was, before I knew what a tween was and before I had a bust. Brought to us by the guru of coming of age, Judy Blume, this constructive chant was the secret anthem of an entire generation of pre-pubesent girls. Ms. Blume penned our inner thoughts before we knew we even had inner thoughts. Her scripture came to us in her classic novel, “Are you there God? It's me Margaret.” She made us feel universally connected to every other girl who sat in their bedrooms, incessantly repeating this chant, while doing what I later discovered were chest exercises meant to tone, lift and define the pectoral muscles. I believed I was willing my breasts to grow to a C cup, which I'd read somewhere was the size of the material girl's breasts and therefore like a prayer, the perfect size. As I soaked in the literary wisdom of Judy with Madonna's lyrics in the background, I religiously disciplined myself to do this ritual, instated by Ms.Blume, until my arms, shoulders and chest ached. I believed. (For the uninitiated reader, like my un-real Dad, Madonna is the material girl who's hit song Like a Prayer caused it's share of controversy )

Because of the free and au-natural lifestyle of the Hippie generation I discovered around age 3 that breasts and nipples come in a wide variety of sizes,shapes and colours. Later, not much later, I learnt a little more about naked breasts from my real dad's private girlie magazine collection that he strategically hid under the couch, bed, spare bed and a few other obvious spots around his place to keep them away from curious eyes. But since curiosity killed the cat, though satisfaction brought him back , and since I told myself I was operating on a strictly need to know basis for the purpose of research into my own physical growth and development, I studied them assiduously. The cat died a few times before I realized that most of those breasts on the glossy pages didn't look at all like the ones I'd seen in person. My frame of reference so far hadn't exposed breasts that resembled balloons, but rather God's creation of the lovely natural mammary container.


I am told by my mother that I quit breast feeding when I was 14 months old. Apparently I knew when I'd had enough and when she went to nurse, I simply used my assertive inside voice and said, “No.” As I pushed her away with my verbal and physical rejections manifesting themselves into one motion, my Mom was devastated. As a good Hippie Mommy, trail blazing for nursing Mother's for decades to follow, she'd been quite prepared to nourish me from her bosom until, at age three or so, I could at least verbalize my rationale for making an obviously uninformed decision in regards to my ceasing to partake in her wholesome dietary offering. She was very pleased when my two younger brothers were more than willing to still latch on well beyond the age of rational thinking. On being informed that newborn baby boys have a greater tendency to get the hang of breast feeding, I wasn't surprised.

My first understanding of lactating breasts came from the milking of our goat's teats. Her name was Togi because she was a Togenberg, a brown goat (The parents, mine not the goat's, weren't as creative with her name.) My mother built ripped forearms milking Togi everyday and every evening through out my early childhood. When Togi passed away, I experienced death for the first time. I cried. We replaced her with an Alpine, a black and white goat. She gave birth to a baby girl that became my goat Ester. Ester became my champion in 4H and she allowed me to learn how to milk on her with my own hands. I guess that was my very first breast exam. When I was 12, Ester also gave me the wonderful opportunity to deliver her twin babies all by myself. I experienced birth for the first time. She was so proud of me and so was my Mom. Ester's daughters and granddaughters provided my family with a plentiful milk supply for many years. I drank goat's milk everyday from the day I quit breast feeding until the day before I turned 19 and not because it was now legal for me to start drinking the hard stuff, but because I got on an airplane and moved down under for a year.

I remember my mother warning me at a young age that not all women developed ample bosom. Since her mother was a triple D and she a small B, she told me that anything was possible in that department.. She said her mother had led her to believe that, once she became a certain age, then surely she would develop breasts of a pleasing magnitude. On mom's 15th birthday Grandma said, “Any day now dear. ” Turning 16 she was reassured, “ Any minute now dear.” At mom's reaching 19 my Grandma was at a loss and sighed, “Dear, I do not know what happened.” So thankfully my mother cautioned and conditioned me not to expect knockers that would get noticed. But I hoped I would at least notice something.

Terry Fox Run- Abbotsford

Come on out and join us in Out running Cancer!!

When: Sunday Sept, 18th at 9am to 11am
Where: Ellwood Park Abbotsford

Let's join in showing support for those we love who have had cancer and those we have lost to cancer and those that have survived!

This year I am involved because of Betty Fox. She took her son's vision and ran until she couldn't run anymore...she passed away just a few months ago. Now we should all take a piece of her hopeful vision and carry on in the fight agaianst cancer!!

My journey thru breast cancer

I am speaking for a one day women's conference Saturday June 11th in Hope,BC at Grace Baptist church. It is a FREE day that includes lunch, door prizes, coffee time, worship music, and me speaking 3 sessions. 1st session is my story, the second is a breast health and breast cancer info session with Q and A, the third I will share about my friendship with Rachel Barkey who lost her battle with the disease almost 2 years ago. We will watch her taped final message. The Day will be filled with inspiration, education, faith and Hope. You will laugh and your spirit will be moved. Come and experience a day with me and many other women:)!! It starts at 11am and goes to 4pm. See you there!!

self-discipline

"Self-discipline requires an understanding of oneself and an awareness of the ways in which one can cope with difficulties, frustrations, and disappointments. Self-discipline affords a person the inclination to concentrate on a task as long as is necessary to learn, perfect, or complete it." - A. Gedrose

Gala Dinner April 30th, 2011

I have been volunteering with Gallery 7 Theatre Company for the past few months and I have offered to sell tickets for their up coming Gala dinner. So you can also get tickets through me:)


We invite you to attend our Third Annual Imagine! Gala on Saturday April 30th at Gallery 7 Theatre in the MEI
Secondary School Gymnasium. Our ultimate dream is to have a fully independent theatre space that is the theatrical
hub of the Fraser Valley. We are so pleased that the Gallery 7 Theatre community has grown with us over the last 20
years. Our goal is to continue to partner with people as we move forward over the next 20 years until we can be in
our own theatre space by 2030! We have made a great beginning raising thousands of dollars with our last two
Imagine galas. This support helps us continue in the present even while building a solid financial footing for our
future. We want you to be part of our third great fundraising event.
Since this season marks our 20th anniversary, we are celebrating with a unique theatre revue production – 20 years
in 20 minutes – a hilarious one-act play that compiles all our productions into one 20 minute piece! We are also
pleased that Abbotsford’s own Cinnamon Toast Funk will be on hand to provide musical entertainment that is sure
to get us moving.
You will enjoy an amazing dinner prepared by award-winning chef, Michael Dicks, owner of Culinary Touch Catering
and Q Steakhouse Restaurant, who is passionate about food and promises to delight us with his culinary creations.
Roving actors in character from previous shows will entertain guests before dinner begins. The evening will be MC’d
by one of Gallery 7’s own actors, Shelley Picard.
You’ll also have an opportunity to bid on high-quality silent auction items. Be sure to visit our website where we will
keep a list of items up for auction.
And finally, you’ll hear testimonials from actors and others who volunteer with the theatre and learn more about
how your participation makes a difference.
So mark your calendar for April 30th and plan to attend Gallery 7’s Imagine Gala, which will take place at the MEI
gym, 4081 Clearbrook Road, in Abbotsford. Tickets are $75/person, of which $25 is a receiptable donation, or you
can purchase a Table of Eight for $600, of which $200 is tax deductible. There will be opportunity for you to
contribute further if you wish to do so.

Tickets are available:
• on-line at www.gallery7theatre.com
• from any of Gallery 7’s board members
• when you call 604-504-5940

We look forward to sharing this evening with all of you!
I will be there for sure!!

"Nothing is more difficult and therefore more precious than to be able to decide." -Napoleon Bonaparte

"Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm." -Winston Churchill