The verse I needed today.

Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart" (1 Samuel 16:7)

Not sure if I'm happy:)

"I think I'm afraid of being happy because whenever I get too happy something bad always happens." — Charlie Brown

Read today had to post...

Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater--give her sperm she will make a baby, give her a house she will give you a home, give her groceries she will give you a meal, give her a smile she will give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what she is given. So if you give her any ......crap, be ready for a ton of sh*t.

Quote for today.

"A pharisee is hard on others and easy on himself, but a spiritual man is easy on others and hard on himself" (A.W. Tozer).

A response...

A blog reader has sent this to me...I appreciate the response. Being a woman of faith, I recognize that my God is the creator of all things, all men and all gifts.I appreciate all of God's creation and the resilient spirit He gave to each and every one of us.

From "Eric"...

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Response to Invictus

Art thou in truth? Then what of him
Who bought thee with his blood?
Who plunged into devouring seas
And snatched thee from the flood?

Who bore for all our fallen race
What none but him could bear,
The God who died that man might live,
And endless glory share?

Of what avail thy vaunted strength,
Apart from his vast might?
Pray that his Light may pierce the gloom,
That thou mayest see aright.

Men are as bubbles on the wave,
As leaves upon the tree.
Thou, captain of thy soul, forsooth!
Who gave that place to thee?

Free will is thine — free agency,
To wield for right or wrong;
But thou must answer unto him
To whom all souls belong.

Bend to the dust that head unbowed
Small part of Life’s great whole!
And see in him, and him alone,
The Captain of thy soul.

~Orson F. Whitney

Invictus: the poem and the movie.

The following poem was the foremost piece of literature that sweeten the soul of Nelson Mandela during the most bitter of times. Because if these words and his heart of forgiveness, he arose victorious against his enemies each day and one day was their strong leader, with no trace of bitterness in his soul. When they tried to break him, he only healed more soundly. when they tried to make him invisible, he became one of the most known names of our modern times. When he was told, it can never be, he took the challenge and made it even more. He never feared to dream, dreams bigger than himself. He sought inspiration in all aspects of life; to keep him always moving and looking forward and never accepting stagnancy.


INVICTUS

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

Verse for today!!

"We are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus." - Romans 8: 37- 39

Hurting for Haiti...

I suggest you read this blog from a young missionary in Haiti, who I believe is from here in the Fraser Valley, http://mafkrul.blogspot.com/, the read will break your heart, move your soul and urge you to do whatever you can to help. It's a personal account of faith and survival, midst the destruction and devastation.

I'm trying to figure out how we can help.Post Christmas most of us are bogged down financially, but I think it's important to find a way to give. I've decided I'm going to go back to work earlier than I thought I would, so that we have some extra income to give.I'm bouncing around ideas in my mind of how to raise money for relief efforts in Haiti.

What we can all do is pray, raise awareness, give what we can (the Canadian Government will match your donation) and not forget the suffering.

Interesting way to spread awareness...

You may have heard of the recent movement on Facebook where Women are encouraged to post the color of their bra,as their status, to show support for the fight against breast cancer. And of course I see this as a VERY worthwhile cause but...

I won't be posting my bra color on my facebook status, though I do appreciate the effort to draw attention to the cause of breast cancer, I feel that bras can be a touchy subject for many breast cancer patients and survivours. Many can never wear a normal bra again (usually nothing sexy or cute) and some will never have a need for one again. I respect the effort however and I get the point; it certainly worked at getting people talking about an important subject:)

I have heard of awareness organization that have the following slogans, "Save the tata's" and "save second base"; though I think they are funny and get people talking about breast cancer(which is great)...it's not just about saving breasts, it's so much more than that!! It's about saving womens' lives!! AND we are so much more than our breasts.
IF our breasts are trying to kill us, then good-riddens! I'm not about saving breasts to risk a life. Though I hope women can stop losing their breasts to this disease, I am much more concerned with their lives!! I can honestly say I have never missed mine. They were my"enemy",trying to end my life. Love the breasts you have ladies!! But if they turn on you, please don't be afraid to say good-bye to them
I've grown to appreciate and love my reconstructive breast implants, I often call them my "adopted-girls", I love them as much as if they were my own. These ones do belong to me, they aren't real, but they are REALLY mine!!

An old friend just sent me the following...very interesting:)


Gents....you may have heard of the recent movement here on Facebook. Women were encouraged to post the color of their bra as their stats as a show of support for the fight against breast cancer. This is a worthwhile cause. With the encouragement of a friend of mine I propose a similar type of movement to show our support for testicular and prostate cancer. If your of a mind, post the color of your underwear as your status to show your support to end prostate and testicular cancer. Hopefully we can bring as much recognition to this form of cancer as the ladies have brought to breast cancer. If you choose to participate, send a copy of this note to all of your male friends and encourage them to show their support as well. Thanks for your time and attention.

So I posted this on my status:

I was asked by a friend to suggest, due to recent movement on fb for women to post the color of their bra in support of breast cancer, that we now request men to post the color of their underwear to show support for testicular and prostate cancer. Why not!! I'm all for raising awareness:) I'm just waiting to see "comando" as a response:)

Support research and awareness for all cancers...we've come along way and most people can now say the word, that was the "C" word for so many generations.

Just curious?!

So I thought for curiosity sake I'd make a list of every kind of medical Doctor I have seen and interacted with along my health journey...or is it my "un-healthy" journey:)

I was actually shocked myself when I realized it was so many, and I'm probably missing some...sad but true.

When I look at list I do have a whole new found respect for our medical system here in Canada, especially here in British Columbia:)

So here it goes...
-GP's (General Practitioner)several

-oncologist (cancer specialist) three (since my cancers were considered different diseases, I had different Dr's.Then my first oncologist went on MAT leave and I've stuck with the one I have now. Dr. Gelmon, she's great!!i continue to go to Vancouver cancer agency to see her every three months)

-radiation oncologist (over sees radiation treatment for cancer)I had all my radiation in Surrey.

-gynecologist and OBGYN (lady stuff and birthing) four

-respiratory specialist (asthma) one

-lung specialist (due to lung damage from radiation therapy) one

-Rheumetologist (not exactly sure what he did, but he was the best looking Dr. I've ever seen:)I was sent to him because of all my aches and pains in bones and joints since treatment.

-ENT (EAr nose and throat guy) 3- I have long running issues with my tonsils and a deviated septum (sinuses)the plan is to have both surgically fixed this year.

-neurologist- brain Dr. (and yes I have one:)!! one; for spinal tap and assessing the dizzy disorder I had for 6 months in 2008.

-cardiologist- heart specialist etc, I saw him for my vericos veins.

- Internist- one because of the gastric tear I had in Jan 2008. Now I'll be seeing him for a colonoscopy, lucky me:)

-radiologist ( the Dr who reads the scans)several

- psychiatrist- on more than one occasion:)

- general surgeons- three

- plastic surgeons -2 (the sounds so "OC" of me:)

- urologist- one (apparently I have a crazy big bladder which creates issues!!)

- dermatologist- I've struggled with acne for years but I've seen a few for many different reasons over the years.

So that's it a guess...and that doesn't include all the interns I have had, especially because my "case" is so unique and all the walk-in clinic and ER doctors!!

I don't want to forget nurses, they are such a crucial part of the Medical system. They are who keeps the medical system moving, Doctors couldn't do their work with out them. I have had a few Dr's and nurses with undesirable bed-side manner, but most are amazing!!

So it looks as though I have seen 35+ medical Doctors over the years. That makes me feel very well cared for. I thank all of them for keeping me alive and allowing me a much better quality of life due to their great work.

And yes there are a few Doctor's I've never had to see...but perhaps in the many more years I have to live I will:)!! If (when!!)I live that long, I may be seeing much more of my plastic surgeon lol!!

Quote for today.

"Your true character is revealed by the clarity of your convictions, the choices you make, and the promises you keep."

My 75th birthday?!!?

Today I turn 38. It's been almost 3 years since I was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer, I often wondered then if I would make it to 38. Now I am here, and I AM HERE!!
Today I feel great! Today I feel like I never went through anything at all. Tonight I am leaving on a jet plane for Las Vegas with some girlfriends:)

Today my husband gave me a birthday card, wishing me a Happy 75th birthday...?!?!? What you ask? Well, not only are we thrilled that I've beat cancer so far, but he intends to give me this card again in 37 years:) Which means I've lived only just over half my life, at least!!

Here's to turning 38 and looking forward to being 75!

Quote for today; the day before my birthday:)

"The best use of life is to spend it for something that outlasts it." – William James