Every day this week I've gotten a little stronger. I'm eager to feel well again, like i did in July. Though I've been rather discouraged by this latest set back, I hold out hope in each day as I feel more and more like myself again.
My pain level is moderate and my body began to function more normally by yesterday morning.Today I was able to go for a 20-30 minute walk, and I'm able to think once again about enjoying regular summer activities with the girls. I can hardly believe the school year is just around the corner for us, and that I'll have Monday and Wednesay afternoons alone while both the girls are in school, WOW! Chris and I could actually have a date, or maybe even go to the gym?!?!? What will it be like...I'll let you know in two weeks:)
Today I met with the Cardio/vascualr surgeon who will be removing my portacath. The surgery is scheduled for October 2nd. I didn't realize that I'd be put under general anesthetic, but aparently taking it out is harder, because tissue grows attached to it and must be cut away when it's removed. I could have had it done Sept, 17th, but because Chris will be away working at that time, I decided to wait. Besides having the surgery in Sept. would have menthaving it done in Mission hospital and by waiting, I get to have it done in the new Abbotsford Hospital which opens this weekend.
Chris will be away working for a few weeks, as he'll be on tour with the Band Starfield, playing drums for them in a across Canada Tour. Starfield is the band that had the floor collapse during their concert in April, my Mom and I were there you can read about our experience back on my blog entries from April 25th-28th.
The guys from Starfield are very good friends of Chris's and they use our studio downstairs for practise sometimes. I know that Chris will have a great time on the road with them, I know it'll be a fun and positive experience for him. Besides he's been practising his drum playing and is getting in really good shape doing it!
It feels good to done all of my cancer treatment, to know that it's behind me. I'll still see my Oncologist every three months, and I believe that she'll keep a close eye on my health for the next 5 years plus. Have the portacath removed will be the final step of having all physical evidence of my illness gone. Though I hardly even notice it anymore, people often stare and I feel I should hide it and/ or explain. It's quite amazing how many people just comment, asking what it is, or they know because they know someone who's had one, or they've had one. I suppose in that way, I'll miss it as an interesting conversation piece...no i won't miss it, I'm glad it will be gone. There will be no more sign that I've ever been sick, that I can't hide. Having said that, obviously I'm not afraid to talk openly about my experience and I will welcome any opportunity to do so.
I've already been asked to re-write my updated story for the book "You are not Alone" that I co-wrote with 12 other cancer survivors, 5 years ago. It has been publisheed in French and Englich, across Canada and in Europe and will not be printed as a third updated Addition. I'm so honoured to have my story continued on in this book.
September 4th I'll be having a minor procedure done, to ensure Cadence's role as the baby of the family. The timing kind of sucks as Chris will be leaving right before and I maybe laid up some what for a few days; but we have great babysitters and Denise will probably still be living in our downstairs room at the time. If I haven't mentioned before, Denise is a new friend that we've extended a helping hand to during a difficult time in her life. We are happy to have her here for now, and the girls are loving her kitten Louie very much. So much so that we may have to re-evaluate their Christmas gift this next year:)
I'm getting this "procedure" done pretty much as soon as possible coming off of treatment. The stress of accidentally adding to our family, when we don't believe anyone is missing, will not be missed. This will be one less thing to worry about, and I'm looking forward to some stress-free living around the corner.
I'm feeling more "normal" as I think about the girls heading off to school, the fall season, warmer clothing, Christmas season, turning 37... and not puke buckets, a cold head, no clothes that fit, wondering if I'll turn 36, and a refining my body-image.
I feel more confident in this season of my life than I ever have and looking back i don't know that I would change very much. Perhaps a couple of details...but not very much.
Feeling stronger everyday, in everyway,
Feather
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Wow! You have reached the summit of your Mt. Everest and can now look over the edge. I was thrilled to hear it announced in church that you had received the "cancer-free" diagnosis. I will continue to pray for your family, especially your girls. They're cancer survivors too.
Post a Comment