I find myself stumbling and fumbling along with physical weakness, and it builds up frustration in me. I cry out inside,"I'm not weak, I'm strong!", as my legs almost give out beneath me. Do I cave into the weakness or do I fight through it? I do neither, instead I pause for a moment, regain my strength and carry on. I do this several times a day, but as the days past chemo grow greater, the times I pause lessen. And then I start all over again. Only two more to go, then the end will be closer in sight.
From the book Blindsided:
"I must rise above the culture of perfection and remember that I can be even if I can no longer do. I am learning to acknowledge weakness, accept assistance, and discover new forms of self-definition."
"I cannot allow myself to be held captive by old dreams"
"Dealing with challenges to health is a great ally in nurturing changes in priority."