A light at the end…

Everyday now I feel a little bit better. Having said that, I’m still probably only functioning at 40%, but that’s much better than the 5% that I was at two weeks ago.
The last three months have been a blurr. I remember pieces but my memory is very scattered. It’s like being on “Chemo” week but for weeks on end. My one Dr says that’s exactly what’s happening to me. He says all the weight I gained in treatment , 35 lbs, became a source of storage for the chemo “toxins” that my body couldn’t handle at the time. IT’s also perhaps why the chemo wasn’t as hard on me as I’d expected, since I never threw up on chemo and had normal weeks through it all, plus I felt basically normal a month after finishing chemo. Now I’ve lost almost all of the weight I gained in treatment, about 25 lbs. But that’s why I’ve felt like I’ve been on chemo and had chemo brain for three months. My one Dr. figures I’ve got about one more month of this and then he figures I’ll start feeling much better.
I’m eating almost normally, though I’m not eating much because I don’t actually feel hungry, but I eat because I know I should.
Today I was suppose to be in Vancouver getting my Herceptin treatment that I’ve been receiving every 21 days since last August and was suppose to go straight through to this August. My Oncologist decided I should take a break from this treatment for one or two rounds. She wants to see me get really a lot better before I take it again. She says that in some rare cases Herceptin can become toxic in someones body, kind of like developing an allergy to it. So we are going to see how I go off of it. I’m also cutting back some of my other meds like anti-depressants, anti-anxiety drugs, sleep aids, and hopefully using less gravol.
Gravol is the one drug I won’t be able to cut out completely, as I used it all the time for motion sickness. Yesterday I drove home in the passenger seat of Caroline’s mini van, I took gravol before I left home, but it was over 4 hours, so by the time I got home I was puking sick. I’ve also had motion sickness, now it’s just a lot worse. I had tests done for the dizziness and vertigo and basically they told me that it’s an annoying condition that may be this bad for the rest of my life. I’ve always had really bad motion sickness, even elevators, swingsets etc. Now I have it just from walking around the house and even from just rolling while in bed. They can’t promise that it’ll ever get better, some people live with condition, and even though it’ll effect my everyday, it’ll just become habit, which it has been for years anyway, now it’s just every day.
We are still trying to raise money for a nanny. If you are able to help us out, you can contact us or perhaps Northview Church. Thank-you for your continued support.
God Bless.